“I am shallow but I am smart” & other thoughts

This is a quote from someone I had lunch with yesterday and really made me think or rethink. When I was in my 20s, I thought one needs to protract image of being good/smart across life aspects. If one wants to be perceived as smart as work/school, then one can’t be saying liking rom com books or designer bags. The more I get older, the more I care less about that, most because I stop caring about what others think of me as I know what I am made of. But this lady’s remark really hit home. She is definitely smart, so smart that although she never worked as litigation lawyer\was nominated twice to apply to be Supreme Court justice (15 only for the entire country with guarantee tenure until 70 years old). At the same time, she is shallow (according to her) as she’s interesting in beauty, clothing, designer bags and shoes, last iPhone, etc. just banal things that has nothing to do with being smart or not for me, but may be for others. What an interesting personality!

The day I published my last post, rather in a negative mode, I got my period (TMI) and I realized that my thoughts were crowded by my hormones. Don’t you get that world is darker the week before your period? Everyone seems annoying and my patience level goes to the floor. But right after day 1, life is beautiful again. This cycle happens every month but more pronounced one month that others. I need to remind myself to avoid over thinking when I am in that period. This month, for some reason my PMS symptoms were more intense. I was moody, my breast felt tender to the point I kept touching myself looking for a bump. Kids were annoying, Husband was annoying. Helper was useless. Day 1 I was exhausted and my legs were restless, thankfully Lizzy was happy to do me some massage.

Negative feedback. I used to hate them because it is like criticizing me instead of my work. Fortunately I am learning to separate them and take them in a constructive way. Yesterday I had all my bosses giving feedback to my work, 7 of them one by one telling me why my presentation is not ready/perfect. I took 3 pages note and smiled along the way and made revisions in 2 hrs. When I finished, I thought “well… that’s not bad, some of the comments were actually helpful.”

Evening work related dinner. After last week’s dinner that ended at midnight and my wasted next day, I am trying to find an excuse to not attend another one this Friday that felt like obligation instead of really wanting to attend. Maybe I should blame with the delta variant?

Connections. One big difference I see between developing country (Philippines) and developed country (USA) is the way people bend the rules. In the Philippines, if you know someone, everything is possible, and the elite group has friend in every possible area you can think of. While in the USA, most people are self reliance and respect rules, which makes things predictable.

Off to my boxing training. 🙂

5 thoughts on ““I am shallow but I am smart” & other thoughts

  1. Lol…”Kids were annoying, husband was annoying, helper was uesless.” 😂Yep, some days are that way. I’m not always the best at dealing with those either. I read once somewhere to just try to recognize that you are in a crappy mood and try to just sort of sit back and let the negative thoughts flow by, realizing that it’s just temporary and will pass. About the work dinner… you say the next day was wasted, but if I remember I think you said you really enjoyed that night out? So maybe it wasn’t really a waste, after all. 🙂


  2. Oh boy … I feel like every month I have those days where I just want to snap at everyone and its those days that I am so grateful to live alone and have the ability to keep from snapping at other people. But then I have to be super aware that I don’t snap on people at work because I am stressed out and tired. I took a week of vacation last week, for my birthday, when I got back this week so much had happened the week before and I had a 90 minute meeting with my boss to get caught up and lets just say she and I laughed a few times over the fact that these major changes are why I never take vacation. She is out now for the next week and a half and she’s asked me to take over for her while she’s out and I am just prepping to fill her in next week with all the changes she has to adapt to.
    Did you end up going to the work dinner? I am not a fan of work meals so fortunately my company doesn’t have them often and due to some health issues I am not asked to attend unless absolutely necessary! How’s your girls doing this week with summer school?


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